


Not The Guy, But The Other Guy

by mcgarrygirl78



Category: The West Wing
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2005-05-24
Updated: 2005-05-24
Packaged: 2019-05-31 07:28:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,198
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15114632
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mcgarrygirl78/pseuds/mcgarrygirl78
Summary: Donna froze.  The beer bottle was halfway to her mouth and she literally froze.  It lasted less than 30 seconds and if the subject had not been CJ herself, she would have laughed.





	Not The Guy, But The Other Guy

**Author's Note:**

> A copy of this work was once archived at National Library, a part of the [ West Wing Fanfiction Central](https://fanlore.org/wiki/West_Wing_Fanfiction_Central), a West Wing fanfiction archive. More information about the Open Doors approved archive move can be found in the [announcement post](http://archiveofourown.org/admin_posts/8325).

**Not The Guy, But The Other Guy**

**by: Montiese**

**Pairing(s):** CJ/Leo  
 **Character(s):** the Senior Staff  
 **Category(s):** Comedy/Drama  
**Rating:** TEEN  
**Disclaimer:** Belongs to Aaron Sorkin, et al.  
**Summary:** Donna froze.  The beer bottle was halfway to her mouth and she literally froze.  It lasted less than 30 seconds and if the subject had not been CJ herself, she would have laughed.  


CJ crept into the room but it looked as if Donna was still awake.  She was curled up in her bed reading a Nora Roberts novel.  CJ smiled.

"What are you still doing awake?" she asked.  "It’s almost 2am."

"Sometimes when you have no time, you make your own.  Just trying to catch up with Nora Roberts.  What’s your excuse?"

"Bruno Gianelli."

"No way.  What about him?"

Suddenly, CJ’s story seemed much more interesting than the attorney falling for the secretive carpenter in a small coastal town.  Donna closed her book.

"He is a very good dancer...who knew?" CJ fell over onto her bed.  "My feet are killing me."

"Bruno has a thing for you." Donna said in a matter of fact tone.

"Of course he does Donna.  I have a pulse don’t I?  he is a notorious ladies man."

"Still handsome."

"Yeah, but bad for my health.  Bruno in my life right now is like a classic Mustang...beautiful, aesthetically pleasing, but a bad choice.  I cannot afford the headache."

"We all do silly things on the campaign trail." Donna replied.  "It’s not the real world."

CJ sat up, running her fingers through her hair.  She felt a bit dizzy; too much brandy.

"Are you speaking from experience Donnatella?" she asked.

"Yes and no."

"Spill it."

CJ began to undress.  She opened the duffle bag to grab pajamas.  It was just shorts and a Bartlet/Hoynes tee shirt and shorts.  CJ could not remember the last time she actually slept in real pajamas.  Her rationale was if she had to run from a burning building she had to look presentable.  No one wanted to end up in the _Times_ or the _Post_ dressed in something with polka dots or Teddy bears.

"There is nothing to spill." Donna said.

"Oh yeah right.  You don’t have to worry Donna; I would never tell a soul."

"I know that."

"Is it about Josh?" CJ asked.

She left her clothes in a heap on the floor.  Sometimes cleaning up after herself was not at the top of CJ Cregg’s list.  Donna rolled her eyes at the mention of Josh.

"Does everyone think something is going on with Josh and me?" she asked as CJ climbed into the bed.

CJ shrugged.

"I don’t think so; neither does Sam.  Toby is unsure but prays not.  Leo pretends to be indifferent but hopes not.  Is there?"

"Josh is like an 8th grade boyfriend; like _Every Rose Has its Thorn_.  We banter, joke, and care very deeply for each other.  Still, we never cross the line into uncharted waters.  I did not realize we were a conversation piece."

"Sure you did.  From the moment you joined Bartlet 4 America."

Donna nodded; she guessed it was true.  If she could put a name on the connection between her and Josh she would.  From the beginning, it had always been there...they were supposed to be together.  Not that kind of together, but together.

"I love _Every Rose Has its Thorn_." CJ said.  "God, I cannot tell you how many times I played that song on repeat after Nathaniel left me."

"Who?" Donna asked.

"We were pretty serious when I was getting my masters at Berkeley.  Then one day I just noticed that we weren’t anymore.  I wish we could figure those things out earlier, you know.  One night Toby called me, asked how Nate was, and I just knew.  He didn’t even bother to break up with me right; he wrote a letter.  He is married now to a girl who used to be a friend of mine."

"Ouch.  I used to play _Is This Love_ when I was breaking up." Donna said.

"I loved Whitesnake.  We saw them a few times in LA.  I went backstage a couple of times...it was in their heyday.  Hair bands were the best.  Remember _I’ll Be There For You_ by Bon Jovi?"

"Mmm, I think I still have a crush on Jon Bon Jovi."

"See, I was always a Richie Sambora kind of girl.  I think it says a lot about me."

"Like what?" Donna said.

"I've never wanted the guy Donna...I want the other guy."

"That doesn’t make any sense.  Wait, maybe it does make sense.  I get it."

"If you understand then deep down you're a Richie Sambora girl too."

"I bet you were all about Paul Michael Glaser too." Donna said.

"Damn right." CJ said.  "I loved those perfectly coifed curls.  I mean, David Soul was definitely cute but he didn’t have the stand out in the crowd thing.  Too cookie cutter for me.  Do you remember _Hysteria_?"

Donna smirked.

"Remember?  It was the soundtrack for my entire senior year of high school.  Def Leppard were huge in Wisconsin."

"I don’t doubt it.  It was the first CD I ever owned...easier to play the title track on repeat."

"You're a sucker for a good metal ballad CJ." Donna said.

"No, I am a sucker for longing.  Sometimes I believe people really want to long for love more than they want love.  It is like the guy who pushed the boulder up the mountain."

"Yeah.  CJ?"

"Hmm?"

"Are you in love with Toby?"

CJ looked at her friend.

"If we are going to have that conversation then I need beer.  The Saga of Tobias and Claudia is long and worthy of alcoholic beverages."

Donna nodded, grabbing the six-pack from the mini-fridge.  She put it on the nightstand between them and got back into bed.

"OK, we met on a campaign in New York City, 1986.  A mutual friend, David Franklin, brought us together.  David called me in from California..."

"Are you in love with Toby?" Donna asked again 25 minutes later.  CJ just gave her the abridged version of her relationship with Toby.

"You tell me Donna." CJ replied.  "What do you think after hearing most of the story?"

Donna finished her second beer.

"I think you two belong together.  I am a romantic though; I believe in true love."

"So do I Donna, I just don’t want to get hurt again."

"Is that why you really don’t date?" Donna asked.  "C’mon CJ, you are pretty, smart, and funny.  I know for a fact that there are a lot of guys into you."

"Guys like Bruno Gianelli."

"No, guys who want more.  You don't date though."

"I actually have been seeing someone for a while.  It is on and off though; and complicated."

"Is he a Republican?" Donna asked, taking a moment to think about Cliff.

"No, that would be easy." CJ said.

"Danny?"

CJ shook her head.

"Who?  Come on CJ, don’t keep me in suspense."

"I need you to swear to never tell a soul Donna, ever."

"Yeah, sure."

"No, no, for real.  I need you to cross your heart, hope to die, etc."

Donna crossed her heart.  Then CJ made her pinky swear.

"God, CJ, who is this guy...the British Prime Minister?"

"Leo McGarry." CJ replied.

Donna froze.  The beer bottle was halfway to her mouth and she literally froze.  It lasted less than 30 seconds and if the subject had not been CJ herself, she would have laughed.

"Oh my God.  Since when?" Donna asked.

"It started after Lillienfield, escalated after the Mendoza confirmation, and solidified after Rosslyn.  It is not easy."

"I believe you.  Let me just say that no one has a clue.  The rumor would have spread like chickenpox if anyone even suspected."

CJ nodded.  She and Leo did a good job of staying under the radar.  It was mostly because they hardly had time to see each other.  Sometimes CJ didn’t like it and said so...other times she rolled with the punches.

"I don’t want to be crude..."

"What?"

"Is this just a sex thing?"

"No, I love him Donna.  I really love him.  Everything has been so upside down lately, you know that.  This reelection has to take top priority; Leo always puts the President first."

"That can't make you happy." Donna replied.

CJ tried to smile as she sipped her third beer.

"No comment.  I will be fine.  You know what though; it feels good to talk about it with someone.  Sometimes it is isolating."

"You said it was on and off.  Are you two seeing other people?  You and Bruno look cozy, and Josh told me he thought Leo might have a thing for his attorney.  What is that about?"

"Leo has been out with Jordan...and Bruno and I, whatever.  I told you it was complicated."

Donna nodded.  It sounded to her like a situation where CJ would be hurt.  She loved Leo as much as the boys did, if not more, but if he hurt CJ, Donna would deck him.

"My eyes are wide open Donna." CJ said.

"Huh?"

"I see the wheels spinning behind your eyes.  I may get hurt, but I think I have the same odds with Leo as I do with another guy."

"Why not give Toby a chance?" Donna asked.

"Why not give Josh a chance?" CJ countered.

"Eww, he is like my brother CJ."

CJ laughed.

"Toby is a bit of the same."

"Not if the story you told me was true."

"He has been seen with Andi lately." CJ said.

"What?  Really?"

"Yeah, and he has not been forthcoming when I tried to ask about it.  I will stay where I am.  If Toby wanted more, he would say."

"No he wouldn’t." Donna said.

"I don’t know.  I have enough problems...let’s stick to one staffer at a time."

"OK."

There was a knock on the door.  CJ and Donna looked at each other.

"Josh." They said in unison.

CJ got up and went to the door.  She was surprised to see Leo there.

"Hey."

"Do you want to take a walk?" he asked.

"Do you know what time it is Leo?"

"No.  I just wanted to talk to you; hold your hand.  It has been a really long night.  Is Donna asleep?"

"Yeah." She lied.  "Wait here; I’ll put on pants."

CJ left the door ajar as she went back into the room.

"Leo." She whispered to Donna.  "He wants to take a walk."

CJ grabbed her jeans, quickly pulling them on.  Finishing her beer, she waved goodnight to Donna and left.

"Its 3:40 by the way." CJ said.

Leo took her hand, slipping his fingers in hers.  CJ smiled at him.

"Come on, I want to take you somewhere special."

"Where?" CJ asked.

"It’s a surprise."

They took the elevator to the top floor.  CJ and Leo walked down a long hallway, out a door.  Up another set of stairs and out a door.  The night breeze caressed CJ’s face like a halo.

"Leo, this is beautiful."

"I know you love rooftops."

The stars of Seattle were visible beyond the monstrosity of the Space Needle.  CJ sat on the lawn chair set up for her.  Leo sat beside her, still holding onto her hand.

"You had a long night." CJ said.

"Yeah.  Strategy mostly.  Bruno, though intoxicated, was still highly effective."

"I hate to give him compliments, but he is brilliant when he puts his mind to it." CJ replied.

"He does not mind giving you compliments." Leo said.

"I know.  It does wonders for my ego."

"The President and I had a talk tonight CJ."

"About what?"

"As usual, he felt the need to butt into what was happening in my love life; my life period.  He kept pestering me about Jordan."

CJ took a deep breath and turned to look at him.

"You look tired Leo." She said.

"I told him that I liked Jordan but I wasn’t seeing her anymore.  I told him I was in love with another woman."

"He thought you still had feelings for Jenny."

"Yeah.  So I told him the truth CJ...I told him everything.  I think it’s the first time anyone could have knocked over Jed Bartlet with a feather.  He was speechless for at least three minutes, and that has to be a record."

CJ smiled.  That must have been a sight to behold.  She held Leo’s hand tighter.

"What happened after he got his voice back?" CJ asked.

"I told him I couldn’t deny my feelings anymore.  I had to stop making you feel like you were not a priority."

"Yeah."

"He was worried about it not working; the implications on our jobs.  I told him we had done fine so far...getting it out will only bring us closer." Leo said.

"Josh will be hurt and betrayed; Toby angry; and Sam happy but quiet because he doesn't want to piss off Toby and Josh."

"How can you be sure?" Leo asked.

CJ looked at him.

"Nevermind.  OK, we will lie to them...tell them it has been less time that it has been.  We tell them as a courtesy, not for approval."

"That’s great Leo.  When are you going to ask me how I feel?"

"CJ, I assumed you wanted this out in the open.  You’ve always made your feelings known."

"What is the open?  Senior staff, friends, the public?" CJ asked.

"For right now just senior staff and the people you trust.  I don’t think it is a good idea to go public until after the election."

CJ nodded; that was true enough.  There was plenty of drama swirling around the administration without CJ’s personal life adding to the brew.

"I love you Leo."

"I love you too, and I am sorry."

"Yeah.  You know that I was partly responsible too.  I could have demanded what I needed, but I was afraid."

"Afraid of what?" Leo asked.

"Of making an ass of myself.  I was afraid that you didn’t feel the same about me as I felt about you.  I didn’t want to add more to both of our full plates.  Many things really."

"You doubted I loved you?"

"You saw other women Leo."

"Rarely; and you saw other men."

"Yeah, but I already knew how I felt."

Leo nodded.  He turned her cheek; kissed her softly.

"Do you want to stay with me tonight?" he asked.

"Donna will wonder.  We can have dinner when we get home.  I need to get some sleep now."

They both stood; Leo led her back to the door.

"Can I just say something before I open this door and we become the Press Secretary and the Chief of Staff again?"

"Yeah."

"I thought this news would make you happier." Leo said.

"So did I."

"Do you not want this CJ?  I guess that is something I never bothered to ask myself.  Maybe I was afraid too."

"I am just tired and not looking forward to some of the reactions of those closest to us."

"OK.  Come here, let me hold you."

CJ tried to fold herself in Leo’s arms, no easy task.  He was good at the embrace...she never grew tired of being enveloped by him.

"Come on, lets get back.  The wake up call is at 6:30." CJ said.  "I will be a zombie in the morning."

"You can sleep on the plane."

"Yeah right."

Leo walked her back to her door.  He didn’t look in every direction for passerby before kissing her.  That probably had to do with the late hour.

"Goodnight Claudia Jean."

"Goodnight."

She caressed his face, kissed him once more, and disappeared behind the door.

\-------------------------------------------------------------

CJ sat on Air Force One, somewhere between sleep and an article on Neil Finn in _Tracks_ Magazine.  Toby sat down beside her.

"Can we talk for a minute?" he asked.

"Yeah." She closed her magazine.  "What’s up?"

"You’ve been seeing Leo on and off for a year?" 

CJ looked at him.  His face was unreadable...not a good sign.

"Do we have to talk about this now?" she asked.

"Yeah."

"Then yes, I have.  We both decided that we wanted more; deserved it.  I am figuring he just told you."

"I want to know why you didn’t." Toby said.

"The same reason you couldn’t tell me that the President had MS.  It was not the right time and there were other people to consider."

"That was a lousy analogy...you always use lousy analogies when you're wrong CJ.  Why didn’t you tell me?"

Toby made a steeple out of his fingers, putting his chin on top.

"I did not want whatever was happening between Leo and I to affect your relationship with him.  I didn’t want anyone to feel they needed to take sides if something happened.  I didn’t want it to affect our relationship Toby."

They looked at each other.  Toby tried to read her eyes.  All he knew was that she was tired.

"Is this what you really want?" he finally asked.

"I don’t know.  Telling people after all this time is strange.  I love Leo though."

"You love Leo." Toby whispered.

"I am sorry that I kept it from you, you can accept the apology or not.  I will understand if you don’t.  But I need your support right now."

Toby nodded.

"You always have my support.  We will talk more when we get home."

"We can also talk about you seeing Andi." CJ said.

"Yeah."

Toby reached over and squeezed her hand.

\----------------------------------------------------------------------

"How did we go from spilling your guts to me to the entire senior staff knowing?" Donna asked.

They were back in DC; she and CJ climbed into the back of an SUV.

"Good question.  Leo decided it was time...I thought it was past time.  He is not having dinners with his attorney anymore.  How is Josh handling it?"

Donna shrugged.

"He doesn’t know how it went on for a year and he had no clue.  I tried to explain to him what on and off meant."

"Not to mention everything he’s been through." CJ said.  "Is he upset?"

"He was Josh CJ."

"I will talk to him.  Toby was Toby too.  It begins."

"I think it will be fine." Donna said.

"That’s because you are an eternal optimist."

Josh climbed into before the SUV pulled off.  Donna looked at him.

"I thought you were with Sam." Donna said.

"Nah, I go where the wind blows Donnatella.  Hey CJ."

"Hi Josh.  It is a short ride; state your case."

"Leo?"

"Yeah."

"I gotta say I had no clue.  Its OK with me though; he needs someone.  He works too hard and has been through so much, which I am sure you now know.  You will be good for him."

"Huh?"

"You’ll be good for him." Josh repeated.

"You're not going to give me the Lyman tirade?" CJ asked.

"You would’ve railed back."

"Sure, but now that I don’t have to, I’m kind of speechless."

"Leo has been through the ringer.  If I went through what he went through and the day finally ended, and I came home to you, preferably in kinky lingerie, I would consider myself to be very lucky." Josh said.

CJ smiled.

"Wow Josh," Donna said.  "It is a real surprise that you have no girlfriend...you are so romantic."

"I know." Josh replied.  "The ladies have no idea what they are missing."

"Thanks Josh." CJ said.

"No problem.  I’ll back you up if the bearded one gets moody." He said.

CJ nodded.

"I think he will be OK.  We are going to talk later.  Have either one of you talked to Sam?"

"He is happy." Donna said.  "Being mum about it in case he is the minority opinion."

Well, at least CJ had been right about one of the three.  Leave it to Josh and Toby to be completely off her radar.

\--------------------------------------------------------------------

CJ lay in bed that night watching campaign coverage on CNN.  She was not paying too much attention; the volume was turned low.  Her knees were pulled up to her chest and she focused on the yellow legal pad in front of her.  CJ was writing a letter to Toby.  Whenever there was too much to say, or they had a good fight, they wrote letters.  They had been doing it 15 years and she had collected many over the years in a cherry oak keepsake box he bought her for her 30th birthday.  When CJ got back to her office that afternoon there was a piece of folded paper on her desk and she knew what it was.  Now she had to respond to it.

Leo’s key turned in the lock...CJ knew he was coming.  He had a key to her place, had for almost six months.  He never came over without calling first or letting her know beforehand.  They were not exclusive, and it was possible that CJ had other company.  It only happened once when Leo called and though it bothered him, he never said a word.  He also never asked her who it was.  Putting a name and face to his torture was not Leo’s idea of a good time.

"Hi." He stood in the doorway.

"Hey, come here."

Leo sat on the edge of the bed.  He put his hands on either side of her, leaning to kiss her mouth.  CJ caressed his cheek.

"What are you doing?" he asked.

"Writing a letter."

"Seriously?"

"Yeah.  Its something we do."

"Toby?"

"Yeah."

He kissed her again.

"Are you feeling better CJ?"

CJ nodded.  Things had gone better than she hoped.  The senior staff, even Toby, took the news of her relationship with Leo as they had everything lately: a nod, a stiff upper lip, and a what’s next.  Over the next several weeks some real feelings might come up but CJ would fight that battle when she got to it.  Leo had been right; they told their friends as a courtesy, not approval.  She put the pad on the night table and turned down the bed for Leo.  As he undressed, she didn’t take her eyes off of him.  There was a smile behind his eyes that finally made it to his lips.

"Boxers too." She said.

Now he really smiled...nearly two months had gone by since they made love.  He laid the clothes across the chair and climbed into bed.  CJ turned out the light.

"Are you naked?" Leo asked.

She pulled the tee shirt over her head.

"Yeah."

Leo pulled her into his arms, kissing her neck.

"Are you really alright?  Did the boys give you a lot of trouble?"

CJ shook her head.

"We will all be fine; it’s a time thing.  In a couple of weeks it will be so frantic no one will care about us."

"I love you CJ.  I am glad you stuck it out until I saw sense."

"I had some distractions along the way." She replied.

"We are not going to talk about that right now.  In fact, we never have to talk about that.  Except..."

"Except?"

"Bruno Gianelli?"

"We are not going there Leo."

CJ pulled him on top of her.  Time for him to start focusing on the matter at hand.  He was all hers now...to drive her crazy, make her smile, and get her so angry that dishes flew.  Would it go far; was being Claudia Jean McGarry a possibility?  She could put up the pictures they took in Geneva...no one would ask questions.  He could stay all night; she could stay all night.  It still amazed her that Leo lived in a hotel suite for the past two and a half years.  He was such a man; at this point he could have bought a house.

"You are so tense.  Relax CJ." Leo said.

"I am not tense."

"Well, you're all tight, and a bit..."

"Don’t say it, eww, don't.  I am relaxing OK."

Leo laughed.

"Wanna talk about it?" he asked.

"What?  Oh, I was thinking about an apartment, maybe a house.  And marriage."

CJ arched her back as Leo entered her.  Damn, he was right she was tense.

"Relax baby.  Are you OK?"

"I’m OK." She shifted her weight under Leo and lifted her thighs.  "I love you too, by the way."

He made gentle love to her.  There seemed to be a lot on her mind and even though Leo knew she was trying, CJ had difficulty relaxing.  She was thinking of a house and marriage...heavy thoughts while having sex.  Did she suspect Leo had a diamond ring in his desk drawer and had for several months?  He bought it on Christmas Eve after he testified.  He planned to propose Election Night, no matter what the result.

"Mmm Leo, that feels good."

CJ wrapped her legs tighter around him.  This, all of this everyday, would be just what he needed.  Leo smiled as he climaxed; CJ was right there with him.  Mrs. McGarry, yeah he thought that would be perfect.


End file.
